Kara-age festival

This is how popular kara-age is in this town..
:)

Harvest season

Finally weekend

Finally weekend~~

It feels like I have worked for 2 weeks straight without any break. This is the best time to take a good rest and relax!

It's raining hard outside, so it's also good to stay at home, read books and watch DVDs.

Statistics is very difficult, but seems to be an interesting, useful tool. I want to study it practically and analysis a lot of data we have. I'll do my best to improve myself, wherever I am, with what I have.

Studying new things makes me active and assertive. Every time when I learn something new, I feel satisfied and want to know more about it. When my boss told me that he wanted me to study data analysis, I didn't find it interesting because statistics requires very difficult mathematics. But now, I'm started liking it. It gives me a lot of new ideas how to interpret the data and the numbers in a meaningful way. Besides, statistics is necessary for most scientists, so it's worth spending some time on trying to get used to it.

One of my dreams: I search my name on the Internet and find the papers I published!

Good quote found today: Time is not money; time is life. So spend it wisely.

でも

絶望してる暇はない、かな…。これについて誰かと話したい…………

脱力感………
これは、今までに味わったことのない感情。

やばいな〜〜ただでさえ体力ないのに気力まで失ったら立ち上がれなくなってしまう…せめてあと一日、落ち込むのは待たなくちゃ。

何かやり遂げたい、その思いが支えになってたけど、それが重要視されないってなんなの？ 平和だなあといってしまえばそれまでだし、恵まれてるしそれ以上望むのはわがままかもしれないけど、でも、と思う。

じゃ何か行動しろよって話ね。文句言うだけだったり、何かしたいんだけどできない言い訳して満足してる人を見てるともどかしい、今自分に関してそういう状況。虎視眈々と好機を狙っているけど、それが可能性のある賭けなのか分からないし、待てない！ 今すぐ行きたい！！！

Why then why?

I don't see the point of everything. They all knew that I wasn't suitable and pretended to be welcoming?

It's very cruel to tell me that now when it's too late. OK if you say what you are supposed to say, I should take the advantage of it.

Indeed it was my decision but the available information was very limited at that time. I didn't know what it's like..
Did I make a bad decision? It's too hard to ask and it's already so complicated to get it right. But I must try. I must go back to the right track as soon as possible.

So shocked!!!!!!

I really fly to Australia NOW!!!! Say goodbye to everything, and just go. I feel so stupid, empty, and frustrated. Why didn't you all just tell me beforehand!!!??? Why couldn't you kindly encourage me to reconsider??? And why do you tell me that now? It's too late and too nasty! How cruel it is? Did I waste the whole year and a half? And you knew it but didn't tell me?

I might not have lost many things otherwise...

Why why why...!? It's shocking, stunning and stupid. You could have just told me so and you could have saved me.

slow recovery

It's been several months since then.

My friend said that even if you are so down at one moment, the time will come when everything seems alright and back to normal. When it comes is not predictable, but the day will come one day.

So an agony won't last forever, even if it seems like an endless pain, it heals one day. It may leave a scar, but it will make you more sensitive to other people's feelings, I believe.

I would like to thank all of my friends who were very supportive, compassionate, and understanding.